Honoring your parents is a command that appears repeatedly in the Bible.
It is not just a rule for children but a principle that applies to people of all ages.
God places a high value on family, and the way we treat our parents reflects our attitude toward Him.
But what does it really mean to honor your parents?
Does this command apply even when parents make mistakes?
How does honoring them look different at different stages of life?
Let’s explore what the Bible teaches about honoring our parents and why it is so important.
The Command to Honor Your Parents
The first time we see this command in the Bible is in Exodus 20:12, when God gives the Ten Commandments to Israel.
He says, “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
This command is so significant that it appears again in Deuteronomy 5:16, and Jesus later reaffirms it in Matthew 15:4.
God was not just giving a suggestion—He was laying down a law for His people to follow.
Honoring parents was a serious matter, and it still is today.
But what does it mean to “honor” them?
Honoring Parents Is More Than Obedience
Many people assume honoring parents simply means obeying them, but it is more than that.
Obedience is important, especially for children still under their parents’ authority.
Ephesians 6:1 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
However, as we grow older, honoring our parents looks different.
Even when we are no longer required to obey them in everything, we are still called to respect them.
To honor someone means to value them, treat them with kindness, and recognize their role in your life.
Even when we disagree with our parents, we can still show honor by speaking to them with respect and showing gratitude for what they have done for us.
The Blessing That Comes With Honoring Parents
One of the unique things about the command to honor your parents is that it comes with a promise.
Ephesians 6:2-3 says, “Honor your father and mother—which is the first commandment with a promise—so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
God connects honoring parents with blessings.
This does not mean that every obedient child will have a perfect life or live to an old age, but it does mean that when we follow God’s design for family relationships, we are more likely to experience peace, wisdom, and stability.
When we honor our parents, we gain their wisdom, their prayers, and their support.
Their guidance can help us avoid mistakes and make better choices.
God’s design for the family is meant to be a source of blessing, and when we respect that, we benefit from it.
When Honoring Parents Is Difficult
For many people, honoring parents is easy when they are loving, kind, and supportive.
But what about when parents have made mistakes?
What if they have been harsh, neglectful, or even abusive?
Does the Bible still expect us to honor them?
The Bible does not say that honoring parents means approving of everything they do.
It does not mean ignoring their wrongs or staying in a harmful situation.
However, it does mean treating them with respect, refusing to hold on to bitterness, and praying for them.
Romans 12:18 reminds us, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Sometimes, honoring a parent might mean setting boundaries while still showing love.
Sometimes, it may mean forgiving them even if they never apologize.
God calls us to be people of grace, even when it is difficult.
Jesus Set the Example of Honoring Parents
Even Jesus, the Son of God, showed honor to His earthly parents.
As a child, Luke 2:51 tells us, “Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart.”
Jesus, who was perfect, still chose to obey His parents while He was under their care.
Even as an adult, He continued to show respect and concern for them.
One of the most touching moments in Scripture is when Jesus was dying on the cross.
Despite His suffering, He looked at His mother, Mary, and made sure she would be taken care of.
In John 19:26-27, Jesus says to her, “Woman, here is your son,” and to John, “Here is your mother.”
Even in His final moments, Jesus made sure His mother would be cared for.
If Jesus, the Son of God, took the time to honor His mother, how much more should we follow His example?
Honoring Parents as Adults
As we grow older, honoring our parents takes on different forms.
It is no longer just about obeying their rules—it is about showing appreciation, staying connected, and offering support when needed.
Proverbs 23:22 advises, “Listen to your father, who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.”
This means that even as adults, we should value our parents’ wisdom and show kindness to them.
For some, this means calling or visiting regularly.
For others, it means helping them with tasks they can no longer do alone.
For aging parents, it may mean providing financial or physical care.
Jesus criticized the religious leaders of His time for neglecting their parents while claiming to be righteous.
In Mark 7:9-13, He condemned them for finding excuses not to help their parents, saying they were disobeying God’s command.
True honor means being there for parents when they need us.
The Connection Between Honoring Parents and Honoring God
The way we treat our parents is deeply connected to our relationship with God.
Colossians 3:20 says, “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”
When we honor our parents, we are not just obeying them—we are obeying God.
He designed families with a purpose, and when we respect His design, we show that we trust Him.
This does not mean that our parents take the place of God in our lives.
If a parent asks us to do something that goes against God’s Word, we must follow God first.
Acts 5:29 reminds us, “We must obey God rather than human beings.”
But in all other cases, showing respect to parents is a reflection of our faith.
When we love them, care for them, and speak kindly to them, we honor God as well.
Teaching the Next Generation to Honor Parents
The way we treat our parents also sets an example for our own children.
If we are disrespectful, impatient, or neglectful toward our parents, our children will likely treat us the same way.
Proverbs 20:20 warns, “If someone curses their father or mother, their lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.”
This shows how serious God takes the way we treat our parents.
When children grow up seeing honor and respect in the family, they learn to practice it themselves.
God’s design for families is to be a cycle of love, where respect is passed down from one generation to the next.
Final Thoughts
Honoring parents is not just a suggestion—it is a command from God that comes with a promise of blessing.
It goes beyond obedience and includes respect, gratitude, and care.
Even when honoring parents is difficult, God calls us to show grace, set healthy boundaries, and forgive where needed.
Jesus set the perfect example of honoring His earthly parents, and we are called to follow in His footsteps.
Honoring parents does not mean they are perfect, but it does mean we recognize the role God gave them in our lives.
By choosing to honor them, we reflect our love for God and set an example for future generations.
If you have struggled to honor your parents, it is never too late to start.
Through prayer, kindness, and patience, you can show them the love of Christ and live in the blessing that comes from following God’s command.